Mallory’s Birth Story

I started out seeing an OB in Dothan with the plan to try for a "natural" birth in the hospital. She was great as a doctor but as soon as I heard her tell me that I would have to be induced at 38 weeks with no exceptions, I started exploring my options. An OB just wasn't the right fit for the birth that I wanted this time around so I stopped seeing her around 26 weeks and started seeing a midwife by 28 weeks. 

There were no midwives closer than 2.5 hours from us so I had all but decided I would have this baby at home unassisted before I'd go to the hospital (barring actual complications, of course). After months of prayer that we would have the birth we were meant to have, God answered those prayers! Jordan came into our area as not only an incredibly experienced and knowledgeable midwife but also just the kindest soul I could have hoped for. 

The pregnancy went along without issues. No gestational diabetes (though I've been accused of having it due to Mallory's size), no issues besides watching my BP and managing it with herbal supplements (which WORKED by the way). 

I was getting miserable and cranky by the time I'd reached about 40.5 weeks. Up until then I hadn't felt ready for baby to come yet so I really think the extra time allowed me to get into the mindset I needed to be in. I'm so thankful for a provider that allowed me to trust my body and my baby to do what they needed to do in their own time. 

My midwife kept a weekly check on baby's heartrate, position, etc but we had agreed that I would have an ultrasound at 41 weeks to check that baby was still doing well so I'd feel comfortable going longer. I had called to schedule the ultrasound on Friday the 29th but had to leave a message. 

Sunday night, the 31st, Kyle and I went out to eat and I was having some contractions that felt a bit like Braxton Hicks but I was timing them anyway and let my doula team know. Angela kept in touch with me throughout the evening and told me to eat well, hydrate, do my inversion/pelvic tilts, and get some good rest in case I started labor that night. 

I woke up at 4:50am on Monday to my water breaking. I gently nudged Kyle and warned him not to panic so he wouldn't wake Norah sleeping between us and told him my water just broke. This man about jumped out of his skin to get out of bed. 🤣 Fortunately Norah stayed asleep. 

Mild contractions started within a few minutes and I let Angela know what was going on so she could relay it to Jordan and the rest of the birth team. She asked if she should tell Ashley (my doula) to go ahead and come over. Boy, am I glad I said yes. Within maybe 20 minutes of Ashley and Kendra arriving I was really having to focus and breathe through the surges while hanging over my birth ball in the living room. 

Let me tell you, I had planned for a long day of laboring with a slow build up. I was NOT prepared for things to get so intense so quickly. Kyle, bless his heart, was running around doing everything, filling the pool, setting things up, getting the bed ready, following the little list I'd made for him. If I could do anything differently next time it would be to make sure he had less to worry about. 

Once I could tell things were picking up, I moved to the bedroom and into the dark, peaceful atmosphere we had created. I had a few surges leaning over the bed then Ashley suggested hopping in the shower to let the warm water help ease things.  

I had to stop several times while getting undressed for the shower so that I could lean over the counter and breathe through a surge. Ashley just kept gently encouraging me through each one, telling me I was strong and reminding me to breathe. 

I got into the shower and let the water help me work through those surges but they were getting really intense. Kyle had started filling up the pool but the water wasn't warm enough yet so they were working on boiling water on the stove to warm it. 

I remember getting out of the shower and breaking down crying for a minute because the surges were so intense. I knew very well that there's a point in labor, transition, where a mother feels like she can't do it anymore and it's typically right before baby arrives. But because I was expecting to labor for hours and hours, I didn't think I should be feeling that yet. But I did. I didn't think I could do it anymore. I definitely didn't see how I could do it for hours longer. The surges were right on top of each other and Ashley kept reminding me to breathe through them. Kyle was right there too, encouraging me and rubbing my back. I was leaning over the bathroom counter and kept bending my knees in a half squat. I really felt like baby was dropping lower because I didn't feel like I could pull my legs together to stand up. 

I moved to the toilet while they continued heating the water for the pool. They call it "dilation station" for a REASON. Not long after I sat down I had a surge, breathed in deep, and when I tried to exhale a roar came out instead. It scared me because I wasn't in control of it. My body was bearing down and each time I would try to exhale slowly, I would roar instead. I told my mom later, I wasn't screaming in pain, it actually felt like progress so it was a good feeling! It felt powerful. I just remember thinking I was going to scare the crap out of everyone around me. 😆

Ashley and Kyle led me to the pool to try and see if the water was ready. We needed to slow things down a little to give my midwife time to arrive. I got in and they asked if it was warm enough. I was already in it and feeling relief so I said yes but when they checked the temp, it wasn't warm enough for baby so they told me to get out. I was so comfortable that I didn't want to move but Ashley said later that after she asked me to get out a couple times and I hadn't budged, she told me that I needed to get out for baby's safety and she'd never seen someone move so fast. Mamas will do anything for their babies. 💓 

I climbed onto the bed on all fours and stayed there for a while. I have no idea how long it was. I remember telling Ashley I just wanted it to be over and I wanted baby OUT. The surges were still on top of each other and baby felt so low like she was about to crown. Ashley reassured me that she didn't see baby's head yet but that I needed to slow things down until Jordan could arrive. She and Angela were on their way but things were happening quickly. 

My body kept bearing down when I would try to exhale. Ashley told me to breathe through it and control those surges and I remember thinking I had no control over it! My body was doing everything on its own. But she was right. I managed to gain control and slow things down. My body then gave me a much needed rest and I didn't have any surges for a while. I think I may have even dozed off for a few minutes. I have no idea how long that lasted. 

About 7:15am Jordan and Angela arrived and Jordan started checking that baby and I were doing well. Jordan wanted to get me into the water to reduce any risk of tearing. I felt like baby was about to crown but somehow I got from the bed into the pool with Kyle's help. The water felt amazing and I instantly relaxed. 

Toward the end of the pregnancy I had been having a lot of anxiety about the pain of crowning and actually pushing baby out. I had an epidural for that part with Norah so it was very much a fear of the unknown. What's funny is that was the EASIEST part of this birth. I knew I was in the home stretch, the water eased so much discomfort, and the pushing just felt like relief. I was able to take it slowly and push as I felt like I should. Jordan just kept monitoring us to make sure we were doing well but otherwise she was hands off. It freaked me out that I kept feeling baby wiggling and moving in between pushes and Angela reminded me that baby was making those cardinal movements she needed to make. 

Jordan told me to make sure I pulled baby up and out of the water as soon as she was born since the water was only just warm enough. I don't remember how many pushes it took but I do remember how empowering it felt to be in complete control of my body and my baby. I felt surrounded by support and love and everyone present respected this sacred birth space. 

Mallory was completely born at 7:33am, I scooped her up, and I think the first thing out of my mouth was "Oh, you're a chunky one!" She was just rolls on rolls. 

I'm crying just writing this because I remember exclamations of joy and words of support echoing from everyone in that moment. I felt pride in myself and relief that baby had made it safely earthside. I cannot begin to explain the vast differences between this experience and my last. I was respected and supported in ways that just couldn't happen in a hospital setting where birth is treated as a medical procedure to be managed rather than the primal, miraculous event that it is. 

No one delivered my baby. I birthed my baby. I did it with an incredible support team that I am so thankful for. I felt safe, encouraged, and cared for every step of the way. I was constantly reminded that I was safe, everything was okay, I was strong, and I could do this. 

My labor was only 2 hours and 45 minutes from my water breaking to baby being born. Realizing that later on, I was able to see why things were so intense for me. Those months of chiropractic care, pelvic tilts, inversions, birth ball ABCs, red raspberry leaf tea, 6 dates a day, all in an effort to prepare my body for labor definitely paid off. Maybe a little too well! 😆 

And yes, when we saw she was a girl we were all floored! We had all been saying "he" this whole time. I had no indication that it was a boy but that didn't stop me from being totally convinced. lol But now we can't imagine not having our second sweet girl! 

Norah and my mama came into the room a couple minutes later and Norah was immediately curious. 

We moved onto the bed and got to have those first few hours as a family in the comfort of our own home. Norah gave her lots of nuzzles and kisses on her head. There was no urging to separate us or cut the cord or to do anything but bond and nurse. Jordan went to work to make sure I was doing well, manage my bleeding, and do all of Mallory's measurements and evaluations. When she was weighed, I think we were all shocked when we heard her say 11lbs 7oz! And with no tears! 

And for my birth worker friends who love stuff like this, the placenta was almost 3lbs on its own! So I've got placenta capsules to last me quite a while. lol 

After watching the full video and seeing the photos, there's so much that I don't remember. I was in such a trance to manage the labor. I don't remember the hip squeezes and massage and effleurage that they were doing. Except the cool cloths Ashley kept on me. Those were the best. 💓 

And afterward I was tended to, fed, cleaned up, given a foot massage, and cared for like every birthing mother should be. They made sure I showered, used the restroom, ate, hydrated, and had everything I needed before leaving us to have our family time. 

Later that day I got a call to schedule my ultrasound. I had to laugh when I told the girl I had already had the baby. She was like well... okay then... congratulations? 🤣 

I honestly can't say enough good things. This was a life changing experience and I don't think it could have gone any better. 

Homebirth is simple, safe, and empowering.